.:Sanuk:.

Falling in [Lifehouse]

2011-12-26T11:44:00.002-05:00

Everytime I see your face
My heart takes off on a high speed chase
Now don't be scared, it's only love
Baby, that we're falling in

I can't wait to tomorrow
This feeling has swallowed me whole
And know that I've lost control
This heart that I've followed
Has left me so hollow
That was then, this is now, yeah you have changed everything

Everytime I see your face
My heart takes off on a high speed chase
Now don't be scared, it's only love
That we're falling in
I would never do you wrong
Or let you down or lead you on
Don't look down, it's only love
Baby, that we're falling in

I'm standing in your driveway
It's midnight and I'm sideways
I have to find out if you feel the same
Won't be easy, have my doubts too
But it's over, without you I'm just lost, incomplete
[ From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/l/lifehouse-lyrics/falling-in-lyrics.html ]
Yeah you feel like home, home to me

Everytime I see your face
My heart takes off on a high speed chase
Now don't be scared, it's only love
That we're falling in
I would never do you wrong
Or let you down or lead you on
Don't look down, it's only love
Baby, that we're falling in, falling in

All those nights I stayed away
Thinking of all the ways to make you mine
All of those smiles will never fade
Never run out of ways to blow my mind

Everytime I see your face
My heart takes off on a high speed chase
Now don't be scared, it's only love
That we're falling in
I would never do you wrong
Or let you down or lead you on
Don't look down, it's only love
Baby, that we're falling in
Don't be scared, it's only love
Baby, that we're falling in

2011-10-30T22:38:00.001-04:00

Dont stop doin whatcha do <3

2011-10-20T23:21:00.001-04:00

head over heels <3

2011-10-16T12:30:00.001-04:00

Complete half marathon?! CHECK!

2011-09-06T22:45:00.001-04:00

and when my hearts weight gets too heavy....hes right there for me....love him

describe the perfect guy:

2011-08-28T01:59:00.001-04:00

Him ♥

I love the summer nights

2011-08-09T22:52:00.000-04:00

Cutest baby EVER

2011-07-29T00:46:00.001-04:00

You cant help but smile and laugh looking at her...I pray that she's a fighter like her mama!

in the pursuit of happiness...

2011-07-22T15:55:00.001-04:00

Swaying in the breeze...

Rolling in

2011-07-22T15:46:00.001-04:00

The darkness is rolling in....on a surprisingly cool breeze. And for once im hoping we get hit with something cool and wet. But for now, ill layout in the hammock enjoying the breeze with a smile on my face. Its been a while since ive played in the rain...Bring it on!!!

Cant see the stars for the field.

2011-07-21T22:08:00.001-04:00

Now dont get me wrong. I believe that every child should play baseball under the big lights. Especially play off games, it ups the excitement and honestly, the effort. However, a week straight of games til 11:00 in a residential area.....suck for the residents trying to sleep. Or look ag the stars....i rather enjoy both a great deal.

Perfect Timing

2011-07-21T14:56:00.000-04:00

Don't you love perfect timing? When things come together suddenly and you read something about a topic you've been bothered with lately? I DO! It's like a SIGN! :)

In this case it was a blog post from the Positivity Blog. Which is actually a very neat/helpful blog. Interesting quotes and ideas and techniques.

I always am guilty of comparing myself to others...what they have, their issues/struggles - normally in my case it's their lack there of. I found myself worrying about all the negative things that a firm could say about me when they see my resume or portfolio...and well, other things too. And then I had an update on my RSS Feed manager (spiffy little tool)....and when I opened up Positivity Blog's newest post - it was like SOMEONE KNEW!!! lol

If you struggle like me with this problem...check out the post. It's not mind blowing info, it's normal stuff - but you know - sometimes you need to hear things repeated again...especially when you're struggling again. For me, this was perfect timing on my reminder...
http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2011/07/20/stop-comparing/comment-page-1/#comment-403411

I heart bed.

2011-07-13T01:06:00.001-04:00

*face plant in pillow*

stop [kickball]

2011-07-06T17:33:00.002-04:00

Oh, history, dont get angry with me.

Stop,stop,stop and don't start again.

You're running from what hasn't been.

Stop stop stop and don't start again.

persistent or stupid?

2011-07-05T22:36:00.000-04:00

so i'm laying here in bed...and i hear a buzzing sound. looking up i see a stink bug. now normally, id get it out of my room...but he's quite interesting to watch. he'll fly up to my light...but circle it....he actually goes with the fan blades....and he loops closer and closer...but doesnt fly toward the light....and then "ping!" and "zzzmmmm" silence. he gets flung onto my bedspread. hanging out a little bit, he gets up again, searches for an angle...and starts his course again..."ping! zmmmmm." silence.....and this continues. now he's chilling on my bra strap (not on me obviously). wonder what he's thinking. is he persistent? or stupid? he's very well "recouping" so he can make the flight again...or, maybe he's decided he's done for the evening. well at least he knows where he wants to go....into the light. and he'll do whatever it takes to get there, even being flung around a bit. its funny because it's not his falling/failing that has me intrigued, it's the fact that he gets back up and does it again, from a different angle. maybe i should take notes...

a ship in harbor is safe....but thats not what a ship was made for.

Chesher cat

2011-07-05T21:02:00.001-04:00

2011-07-03T13:52:00.001-04:00

My motivation boost for todays 4 mi run later tonight!

keep a light on

2011-06-29T23:10:00.000-04:00

what am i doing here? laying here with a lump in my throat and my eye lids doubling for piss-poor dams. they have failed me...cracks have turned into rivers running down the walls of my face. how did i get back to this place again? it's so wet and cold...i need to escape this place. first, let me pick up this anchor and drag these shackles...and maybe when i get closer to light....those pieces of ice i'm carrying will all melt away. then maybe ill be able to lie down and rest, basking in the sun.

until then...

"try to leave a light on when I’m gone, something i rely on to get home. one i can feel at night, a naked light, a fire to keep me warm."

2011-06-28T12:14:00.001-04:00

Nomnomnom! Open faced sandwhich w goat cheese and fresh basil+cilantro from the garden!

Chuggin along...

2011-06-27T23:33:00.001-04:00

Thesis pages, done.
Comprehensive pages, need a new render + text.
Art school, need text.
Pza di Castello, need text.
Barn project, in concept phase, working on at work (tisk tisk) + after others are finished.

Come lay your head on my pillow...

2011-06-26T22:19:00.001-04:00

...I promise I wont make an audible sound. Just let me wrap my arms around you for a while. Ill lay there quietly, still as a stone...my touch soft as the heather. Laying there with our bodies intwinded, I could fall asleep to the beating of your heart. Come lay your head on my pillow, I promise not to make a sound...ill lay there next to you wondering what two hearts growing together would sound like in their intwining.

Workin on the GROWL!

2011-06-26T19:01:00.001-04:00

Ran 3mi .... Without speed walking at all! at a good pace! So very excited! I could have ran longer but thought about my eun thus and figured id better not! But yayyyyy!

Stegawrapper!

2011-06-24T11:28:00.001-04:00

Clearly used my imagination and creativity to create this little stegasaurus out of candy wrappers (at the end of a meeting)

Tofu Chilli

2011-06-15T21:04:00.001-04:00

Homemade! Myself! :)

Healthilee Update!

2011-06-14T13:54:00.001-04:00

I’m a little late in blogging about what I’ve been doing health wise! But, better late than never! Two things:

1. I signed up for the Hershey Half Marathon October 16th.

I’ve been looking for an activity that I can do anywhere, and I think it’s time to make the jump to distance running…So, I figured I’d sign up for a race so I can motivate myself to get out there and get healthy! So I’ve signed up for runnersworld.com  they really have some awesome tools for runners/walkers/nutrition/workouts. I’m using their site for training information/nutrition/workouts. I’m trying to find a website that I can log my training on and share it with people! But we’ll see. I have to look into it! 124 days to race day!

2. This week I started a 3 week cleanse.

I got it from Nikki from “A Healthy Balance” she’s really helpful and pretty much awesome. We agreed that the cleanses from stores (chemical induced) were not the best way to go at all. So I asked her about a food cleanse, healthy! So she gave me this 3wk food cleanse she’s had several women in her program do. The basics of it are no meat, nothing out of a package for 1 week, then slowly re-introducing the HEALTHY food.

Week 1: fruits, veggies, potatoes, beans, nuts, seeds, olive oil, chobani greek yogurt, spices and herbs-no mixed seasonings. (no grains, no meat, no bottled or packaged products)
Week 2: add in oatmeal, milk, eggs and fish, salsa, Newman's all natural salad dressings, hummus/tabouli
Week 3: add back low fat cheese, whole grains- La Tortilla Factory or other high fiber wraps/bread, kashi cereal- or other high fiber cereal, other condiments (still try to nix junky things like ketchup, mayo, dressings and dips with lots of preservatives)

It’s working so far eating just veggies/fruit and greek yogurt, but it’s only day 2! So um, we’ll see how I’m doing come Thursday!!! Encouragement is welcome! So if you see me staring at a menu for longer than 15 minutes, I’m probably temped to order something I shouldn’t!!! So smack me and order a salad for me! I can tell you I can’t wait til next week when I can have fish!!! I could probably see myself living off of fish alone. But, we’ll see. Any recipes you might have would be AWESOME!

So I don’t know if I’m going to write about my runs/workouts here – or make another blog. Ugh decisions!

Sketchbook discoveries...

2011-06-09T22:36:00.001-04:00

Best valentines day evveeeeerrrr lol miss those days!

Success comes in cans, not cant's.

2011-06-09T22:03:00.000-04:00

Successes
1. Masters Degree by 24
2. Head Coach at collegiate level (during masters degree)
3. Played varsity sport during architecture school
(if you were an architecture student, or know anyone
who was...you'd understand why this is a success! lol)
5. Studied abroad/lived in Italy
6. Traveled to 9 countries by 22

Goals
1 year - become Leed Certified, secure a job at a firm.
5 year - become a Licensed Architect.

despite it all, you're still here

2011-06-09T21:52:00.000-04:00

despite everything, you're always there and in for the long haul...and when everything seems as though it's crumbling or fanning flames, you're always there to help me through....despite it all. I love you and am truly lucky to have you....thank you.

Crazy Girl by Eli Young Band <-- sound bite

Baby why you wanna cry?
You really oughta know that I
Just have to walk away sometimes
We’re gonna do what lovers do
We’re gonna have a fight or two
But I ain’t ever changin’ my mind

Crazy girl, don’t you know that I love you?
And I wouldn’t dream of goin’ nowhere
Silly woman, come here, let me hold you
Have I told you lately?
I love you like crazy, girl

Wouldn’t miss a single day
I’d probably just fade away
Without you, I’d lose my mind
Before you ever came along
I was livin’ life all wrong
Smartest thing I ever did was make you all mine

Crazy girl, don’t you know that I love you?
And I wouldn’t dream of goin’ nowhere
Silly woman, come here, let me hold you
Have I told you lately?
I love you like crazy, girl

Crazy girl

Crazy girl, don’t you know that I love you?
And I wouldn’t dream of goin’ nowhere
Silly woman, come here, let me hold you
Have I told you lately,
I love you like

Crazy, girl, don’t you know that I love you?
And I wouldn’t dream of goin’ nowhere
Silly woman, come here, let me hold you
Have I told you lately?
I love you like crazy, girl

Like crazy
Crazy girl
Like crazy
Crazy girl
Like crazy

Where did I put those matches?

2011-06-06T12:59:00.000-04:00

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within. ~Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

If you really put a small value upon yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price. ~Author Unknown

It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves. ~Edmund Hillary

Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am not a has-been. I am a will be. ~Lauren Bacall

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint," then by all means paint, and that voice will be silenced. ~Vincent Van Gogh

It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to. ~W.C. Fields

A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her. ~David Brinkley

Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway. ~Mary Kay Ash

Always act like you're wearing an invisible crown. ~Author Unknown

It's hard to fight an enemy who has outposts in your head. ~Sally Kempton, Esquire, 1970

When the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, it may be that they take better care of it there. ~Cecil Selig

Sex appeal is fifty percent what you've got and fifty percent what people think you've got. ~Sophia Loren

Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. ~William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure, 1604

Your problem is you're... too busy holding onto your unworthiness. ~Ram Dass

It's me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence.
~Paula Cole, "Me," This Fire

Life marks us all down, so it's just as well that we start out by overpricing ourselves. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960

Self-love seems so often unrequited. ~Anthony Powell

If you must love your neighbor as yourself, it is at least as fair to love yourself as your neighbor. ~Nicholas de Chamfort

When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you. ~African Proverb

Be humble, for the worst thing in the world is of the same stuff as you; be confident, for the stars are of the same stuff as you. ~Nicholai Velimirovic

God wisely designed the human body so that we can neither pat our own backs nor kick ourselves too easily. ~Author Unknown

Mediocrity is a hand-rail. ~Charles Louis de Secondat, Baron de Montesquieu, Mes pensées

Only as high as I reach can I grow,
Only as far as I seek can I go,
Only as deep as I look can I see,
Only as much as I dream can I be.
~Karen Ravn

You do you. Ill do me.

2011-04-27T22:58:00.001-04:00

It just takes too much energy to be crabby and negative all the time. All it does is bring you down, along with those around you. Trust me I learned this the hard way. Just let it go...enjoy the time you DO have. I think we all need to, myself included...workin on it!

Happilee. Thats how I want to live.

Namasde (spelling? Eh who cares right?)

2011-04-17T22:48:00.001-04:00

The sky is beautiful tonight. The moon is playing hide and seek in the clouds, and when he comes out to play...his light bounces off walls of stone on the mountain side :)

2011-04-15T22:05:00.001-04:00

[Albert Einstein] There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle; you can live as if everything is a miracle.

2011-04-11T23:15:00.001-04:00

[Benjamin Franklin] Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.

2011-04-10T23:12:00.001-04:00

[Leo Tolstoy] Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them.

2011-04-10T23:08:00.001-04:00

[Helen Keller] Discouraged not by difficulties without, or the anguish of ages within, the heart listens to a secret voice that whispers: "Be not dismayed; in the future lies the Promised Land."

2011-04-09T18:39:00.001-04:00

[Mother Teresa] Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier.

2011-04-07T23:31:00.001-04:00

[Lao Tzu] Manifest plainness, embrace simplicity, reduce selfishness, have few desires.

I dont know if I agree with the last one...as long as theyre positive ones I think you can have more than a "few" desires. I do, and will. :)

Owwww

2011-04-06T07:14:00.001-04:00

My eyes huuuuurrrrrrtttttt.

2011-04-06T02:55:00.001-04:00

Leo Tolstoy, 1828-1910 Happiness does not depend on outward things, but on the way we see them.

And she said,

2011-04-04T22:37:00.001-04:00

"think of all the beauty still left around you and be happy" [ann frank]

Breathe

2011-04-04T21:44:00.001-04:00

If you would have talked to me early today I was in such a crappy mood...too much stressing, giving things too much energy that didn't deserve it, etc. after my run I ran a lot of my anger + frustrations out (with help from cindy being an ear to listen while I hugged my problems out while gasping for air, thank you dear!) Then yoga gave me the quiet and steady breath to exhale all the negative energy out. For once I felt stretched and at peace after the day's blunders. I'm going to try to just breathe and find that inner peace next time when I have those negative energies following me and trying to make it into my heart. "and breaaathhhheee, just breathe, ohhhh just breathe" namasdae.

The Next Milestone

2011-03-30T20:01:00.000-04:00

So I have this idea. 25, big "milestone" right? Sure. They say after 21 there is nothing to look forward to. However, I have a plan for the next 12 months...yes, thats right - a plan for good ol' 25! Each month I'm going to work on 8 points. I'm going to record all of my feelings, experiences, and lessons learned for each month.

I'm just ironing out some ideas before April 1st, and then I'll begin my first month! Wish me luck!

Prudent Advice [1]

2011-03-23T23:21:00.000-04:00

9 give lots of hugs to everyone you care for
17 be generous...with your time, your money, and your heart
23 when frustrating things happen, keep them in perspective
28 splurge on fresh flowers once in a while
32 forgive your mother
40 try to use people's names when you address them, even if you're fairly certain you'll never see them again
43 don't be afraid to get lost
54 travel light
57 there are some topics that people like to talk about, but very few people want to hear about
67 word is bond
69 know how to take a joke...and know how to draw a line if made at your expense
75 always rsvp
77 sometimes it's just not about you
78 learn how to take a compliment...gracefully
80 not everyone is going to like you, and thats just fine
83 sometimes you will feel alone...it's part of the human condition
85 if you're asking yourself if you should have one more drink, the answer is no
93 there is always room for one more at the table
95 have a firm handshake...no reason to be limp-wristed just because you're female
98 if you haven't worn it i a year, give it away
101 littering? NO.
104 the size of your breasts truly does not matter
107 a handwritten letter exudes warmth and class
108 compliment people
116 at the close of each day, fill your head with thoughts of how lucky you are
119 if you cant avoid an argument, at least avoid doing it in public
123 you don't have to pretend you know something if you don't...it's okay to say "i don't know"
130 order the local specialty
151 let go
152 men, as a rule, are not good mind readers...imagine a 3 x 5 index card: short and to the point
164 overflow with passionate exuberance every now and then
167 there is no need to comment on anyones weight (work in progress)
171 there is no "man's" work
179 talk to strangers
180 advocate for the causes you believe in
181 be where you are

parachute [♥] ingrid michaelson

2011-03-13T22:45:00.000-04:00

i dont need a parachute baby if i've got you
cause you're gonna catch me, you're gonna catch if i fall

hand be hind my neck, arm around my waist
...never gonna let me fall

[ingrid michaelson]

new infatuation....

2011-03-09T14:19:00.000-05:00

an·thro·pol·o·gy
[an-thruh-pol-uh-jee]
–noun

1. the science that deals with the origins, physical and cultural development, biological characteristics, and social customs and beliefs of humankind.

2. the study of human beings' similarity to and divergence from other animals.

3. the science of humans and their works.

4. Also called philosophical anthropology. the study of the nature and essence of humankind.

2011-03-08T20:09:00.001-05:00

Chesher cat moon :)

my wisdom well is gone

2011-03-04T15:50:00.000-05:00

whelp, what little wisdom i had - it's now gone. got my widsom teeth out today, yes, all four. so im sitting in the chair and as im getting the needle put into my arm the doctor is like "why do you have slip on shoes?" well, i thought i had read "please do wear slip on shoes..." aparently it was "do not" then his voice gets louder and he's like "did you even read your pamphlet? first time you ate, this time you didn't take your medicine before." and I go, "Doctor I didn't have a prescription in my packet that you gave me." and he goes, "yes, yes you did." I'm pretty sure I would have seen it! The nurse at the desk even said it wasn't in my packet when i brought it. what an arrogent guy. ugh. okay. sorry. *breathe*

i've slept a lot today. the proceedure went by really fast, haha of course i was asleep. but i was awake waiting for the anesticia (sp?) to kick in...then when i opened my eyes i was like, "okay, have we started this thing yet?" and my old school friend Emily who works there was like, "haha yes leellen, you're all done!" and the best news...it only cost me $388 when i thought i was going to be $500! SCORE! to some that doesn't seem like much of a break - ohhhh but it is!

so now im relaxing at the house with gauze in my mouth, i was still bleeding a good amount when i woke up from my nap when i got home. i just want to drink something. but that defeats the purpose of the gauze! well i should go put some ice packs (frozen corn packs in this case) on my cheeks so I don't look like a chipmonk.

im excited to just relax for a while at the house. sleep, movies, recorded shows.

have a good weekend everyone!

2011-03-02T23:27:00.002-05:00

All i smell is lavender....jerk. lol

I am such a LIST person....this is perfect!

2011-03-01T23:08:00.002-05:00

This is something I'd do/say...right babe?

2011-03-01T22:00:00.001-05:00

2011-03-01T21:28:00.001-05:00

You're never too old to wish on a shooting star! :)

Snowfall

2011-02-28T13:03:00.000-05:00

Written by Ingrid Michaelson

I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that quiets the world
I want a snowfall kind of love
'Cause I'm a snowfall kind of girl
I want a snowfall kind of love
That lights up the sky from below
I want a snowfall kind of love
That brings people to their window
Won't you bury me in your quiet love
Oh bury me in your quiet love
Bury me in your quiet love
And we will blow away
I want a snowfall kind of love
The kind of love that keeps you in bed all day
Oh I want to walk through with you
And watch it all melt away
Won't you bury me in your quiet love
Oh bury me in your quiet love
Bury me in your quiet love
And we will blow away

2011-02-25T16:40:00.001-05:00

Just give me an umbrella and call me mary poppins!

2011-02-24T21:59:00.001-05:00

what little wisdom i have is being taken from me tomorrow!

in one word

2011-02-21T21:34:00.000-05:00

big pizza pie :)

2011-02-18T20:01:00.002-05:00

You know those moments when something is so beautiful it takes your breathe away and you sit there staring with a huge grin and a warm feeling? The moon does that to me when it's so big that i feel like i could stand up and give the man on the moon a kiss :)

Archi Barbie

2011-02-16T10:03:00.000-05:00

I think it's pretty funny that they chose a woman architect to look like this...Majority of the women I see in architecture are wearing dress pants...but hey, a dress that becomes "architecturally inspired" by putting glittle buildings on it works too I guess? I suppose I should take notes from Barbie if I want to get a job.

http://toyxplosion.com/2011/02/barbie-i-can-be…architect-coming-fall-2011/

But in all seriousness, I guess it is a good thing to attach a career to Barbie to encourage young girls to strive for something. However, I hope girls don't think they can wear an awful dress and make pink models and breeze into becoming an architect. lol.

♥

2011-02-14T22:29:00.001-05:00

best valentine's day, hands down.

2011-02-13T23:16:00.001-05:00

Today was fine. And then...wall.

rawr: that's dinosaur for "i love you"

2011-02-13T00:21:00.002-05:00

in most cases when guys ask their girlfriend what they want for valentines day, the girls SAY "oh, nothing" or they say something piddley (is that a word?) when REALLY their boyfriend is supposed to detect this "code" meaning they want some exuberant thing.

yeahhhh i'm not that girl. not gonna lie, not a huge fan of valentines day. never really was - it's a hallmark holiday, more reasons for spending money and helping businesses out. why not tell someone you love them whenever, not just on some special day. (confession, ive never really had a good valentines day anyways, so i don't ever expect anything).

so when my boyfriend asked me what i wanted to do for valentines day, i was completely honest and told him i don't really consider it a holiday due to past experiences and the commercialism of it. so, i said "but, im a girl that really a thoughtfully picked card would be PLENTY. i'm all about the thoughtful gifts.

well, he took it upon himself to do just that, and i can tell you that i have NEVER received a more thoughtful card. i love it. i laughed so hard...in order to save him and not have him angry with me...i have only attached the front of this card (see below).

as you can see, this is one of the tri-boards you used for your science fair project in school...on the inside is a blown up picture using his hands and face from a picture we took at the smithsonian where he had on a dinosaur cap (green, complete with colored scales and horns like a triceratops) and matching mittens! he drew in his body and then cut holes at his sides so even though we are apart (we live 60 miles away from each other) i can hug him whenever i want! the hands are on the flaps so it actually envelopes me!!!

sooo thoughtful. :) i loved it! my cheeks hurt from smiling so much! i didn't show the inside picture because he'd kill me if i posted it. lol. but to get an idea....hint: the original picture is on facebook! lol

he's the best - RAWR babe!

2011-02-06T23:20:00.001-05:00

Great weekend of fun and laughter, thank you! However, you should know my bed is lonely...you are missed.

im not in it to win it, im in it for you ♥

2011-01-30T23:20:00.003-05:00

i dont know where to start. in the beginning i had a feeling that we were going to have a lot of fun together and make each other pretty happy. comfort was not an issue and being ourselves wasn't much of one either. but in the past few months we've exceeded my expectations of how things would go and what i had found.

i dropped a line out in the sea, not expecting to catch anything...but shortly after putting my feet in the water there you were. open, warm, inviting. i know im quirky and i know im pretty random....but you've proven that no matter what i feel are flaws to me...you've not only embraced them, but you've found them entertaining and "cute."

i didn't know when i was going to find someone who would love me for me....i had been waiting a long time and yet still didnt expect to find it soon...and here you are. i constantly smile when im with you, i laugh more than i have with anyone else. i can't take my eyes off of you, i am staring in awe that you're mine...because i am surprised and well i dont know how to say it. i am just so thankful that i have you in my life and i never want to take one second for granted....

so when you see me oogling you or staring - know its because im not taking any moment i have with you for granted. i want to commit each one to memory. everything from those blue eyes, to your smile, the sound of your laugh, your silly face that youll tell "said young people" was the moment i knew i had fell in love with you, the feel of your hands...everything. so when we're apart i have the warmth of your memory.

i wish you knew how happy you made me, because i can't seem to explain - or express just how much you do for me in that department. and the greatest thing is - you don't have to try. you're just you and melt.

days and weekends go by so fast, every time i leave i find myself saddened by saying "see you later." some day it'll be "see you for dinner" and being able to say good night and good morning more than 2 days in a row. i look forward to the days where we settle for watching the snow fall outside because we're too old to go out and throw each other in it like we used to do. haha or the days where we REALLY ARE old and sore from
"said activities." but every ache and pain will be worth it.

there's a quote from the guardian that i have always wanted to be able to say when im old and gray...

"Ya' know what though, I don't mind. I mean if my muscles ache, it's because I've used 'em. It's hard for me to walk up them steps now, its 'cuz I walked up 'em every night to lay next to a man who loved me. I got a few wrinkles here and there, but I've layed under thousands of skies with sunny days. I look and feel this way, well cuz I drank and I smoked, I lived and I loved, danced, sang, sweat and screwed my way thorough a pretty damn good life if you ask me. Getting old ain't bad [...] Getting old, that's earned."

and you make me feel like im on the right path to do it...with you i feel i can do anything.

just know that i care for you so much more than i am humanly capable of explaining, my heart grows bigger when i'm around you and sometimes i can't fathom how it does it.......but it does it for you.

im not in it to win it, im in it for you ♥

trying to get back to flexibility...

2011-01-25T23:03:00.000-05:00

limbo - just used to be a game i was awesome at when i was a kid. now, it's a state i can't seem to escape.

ah but there is hope...

"blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape."

Dear Life by Anthony Hamilton

2011-01-25T20:50:00.000-05:00

Early was the morn, flowers filled with dew,
I became somebody, through loving you.
Softly as a child, born in natural rain,
I predict the seasons, to go unchanged.

Sometimes in life,
You run across a love unknown,
Without a reason, it seems like you, belong.
Hold on Dear Life,
Don't go off running from what's new,
I became somebody, through loving you.

Warm was the sun, that covered my body so.
Reminded me of you, as I'd first known.
Those were tha days, tha days, that changed my life, and made me new,
I became somebody, through loving you.

Sometimes in life,
You run across a love unknown,
Without a reason, it feels like you, belong.
Hold on Dear Life,
Don't go off running from what's new,
I became somebody, through loving you.

As the sun shined, down on me,
I know with you in love is where I wonna be,
Oooh sometimes, I go on through life,
thinking that love is something that's not meant for me,

Woooah...Somebody, somebody.

Hold on dear life,
Don't go off running from what's new,
I became somebody, through loving you.
I became somebody, through loving you.
Oh, I became somebody, through loving you.
Woah, oh. Oooooooooooo

2011-01-18T21:44:00.003-05:00

Its my blog, i do what i want. *picks up megaphone to mouth* I LOVE HIM SO MUCH! HE MAKES ME SO INCREDIBLY HAPPY! *puts megaphone down, skips away merrily*

2011-01-16T22:22:00.001-05:00

...and in a way, i now understand. *faith+strength+hope*

2011-01-16T22:18:00.001-05:00

and yet, here i am.

empty handed

2011-01-06T23:53:00.002-05:00

so i can't sleep. i haven't really found it easy to fall asleep lately. don't know why. but. i do know that i lay here thinking about you with my arm stretched out to find a cold vacant spot next to me. so i lay here, tossing and turning...wishing i'd bump into you, or my knee would accidentally hit yours - that way i could roll over close to you, pull the blanket back up on you and hug you, whispering, "im sorry sweetheart." though im sure it can be bothersome with me interrupting your sleep - of which makes me feel awful for waking you. however, it's in the smaller hours of the night like this, while i'm laying here, empty handed...that make me cherish those bumps and interruptions - because i know im waking up to find you right next to me.

2011-01-05T21:51:00.001-05:00

Under Covers.....release date January 2011 ;)

2011-01-03T23:03:00.001-05:00

im a slacker, i know. hopefully 2011 will bring me more to write about! ive neglected "along the way" too...will be searching! :) look for new "tags" soon! :D

2010-12-31T19:32:00.001-05:00

Wishing you a safe & happy new year! May 2011 bring you much joy & happiness!

2010-12-25T08:06:00.001-05:00

Very Merry Christmas to you and your family! Hope the fat man treated you well :)

missing you

2010-12-22T22:34:00.001-05:00

to dance is to grow

2010-12-12T21:30:00.000-05:00

"without rain, nothing grows..."
[anon.]

baby, here's to learning to dance in the rain [♥]
i dont wanna dance [or grow] with anyone else

2010-12-12T15:07:00.001-05:00

At the Weinburg Center watching the Nutcracker w/ Aunt Deb! Bumbababum-bum-bum-dabum! (nutcracker song) lol

2011: Live HealthiLEE Ever After

2010-12-09T11:01:00.000-05:00

Yes, I'm aware it is a bit early to be thinking about New Years Resolutions. However, mine requires some research and planning in order to accomplish it!

I don't have details for much and I wan't to formulate it more before I post it....also closer to the New Year. But. I can give you some sneak peaks!

Resolution will involve the following:
1. Various 3k & 5k runs throughout the year (can be various locations!)
2. August 28th | Mini-Sprint Triathalon
(the one I couldn't do last year because I was sick for a month and couldn't train)
3. September 25th | YMCA Sprint-Distance Triathalon in Downtown Frederick
4. POSSIBLY the Tour de Cure <--- various options on dates
-Howard County, DC, Jersey, RI <---depends how it fits into the schedule.

So! FRIENDS - if you know of any 3k or 5k or Dual-a-Thons in your area you may want to do...let me know! We can do it together = visit + exercise! (probably not til summer please).

I need to now plan the rest of the resolution steps...these events are like "check points" and motivations to the over all goal :) I have to get in shape first before these events. Haha. SWEET.

Support and Partners in Crime are welcome :)

2010-12-04T12:04:00.001-05:00

Oh wait, you must be the kid 12' from me, intenly looking at his phone and must be watching music videos WITHOUT earphones. How inconsiderate. Douche.

2010-12-04T11:59:00.001-05:00

If i can understand word for word the music from your ipod and youre not even within a 10' radius of me...there's an issue you should tend to.

"raining like cats and dogs"

2010-12-01T08:40:00.005-05:00

In driving to work today...even through what felt like a monsoon...I never understood the idiom "raining like cats and dogs" so....I did some research (answers.com). And studying architecture....I believe I came across a fun one:

The phrase raining cats and dogs is of unknown origin. A number of folk tales have been put forward to explain the phrase, for example...

In 16th century Europe when peasant homes were commonly thatched, the home was constructed in such a manner that animals could crawl into the thatch and find shelter from the elements, and would fall out during heavy rain.

Drainage systems on buildings in 17th century Europe were poor, and may have disgorged their contents during heavy showers, including the corpses of any animals that had accumulated in them. This occurrence is documented in Johnathan Swift's 1710 poem 'Description of a City Shower', in which he describes 'Drowned puppies, stinking sprats, all drenched in mud, Dead cats and turnip-tops come tumbling down the flood'.

I was interested in this poem...so...of course I looked it up and would share...however, it's 63 lines! Soooo! you can just search it online and read it for yourself if you're that interested...I skimmed it...but that was enough for me.

Please drive safely out there folks!!!

Under Control

2010-11-30T10:47:00.000-05:00

I turn my head I can't shake the look you gave
And I'm good as dead
Cause oh those eyes are all it takes
And all I want is you

So I pull away
All I do is sit and wait
And I might as well write the words right on my face
That all I want is you, oh is you

Because I've kept my heart under control
Oh but lately all this time has taken its toll
Said I tried to but I can't hold back what's deep in my soul
So darling please forgive me
I want you and you'll just have to know

And all my fears creep and crawl across my skin and
These four walls are after me and moving in
And all that I want to do
Is give up, give in, let this one stay where it is
But I don't suppose I will

[Parachute]

2010-11-30T08:59:00.001-05:00

Needs two things...
1. to get better
2. a vacation...

a lighthouse in the storm

2010-11-29T21:10:00.001-05:00

why do i feel like everything is shaken up? it's like a weird cloud is rolling in & engulfing everything...

...but i'll always stand here steady, shining bright, until you come home safe out of the storm.

2010-11-27T07:05:00.001-05:00

7am, already half way home from getting bloodwork done...please note it is saturday, and that i refuse to get up before 930/10 tomorrow morning. Back to bed?

Give Thanks

2010-11-25T15:55:00.001-05:00

1. Loving family to support me and love me unconditionally
2. Amazing friends to laugh and cry with
3. Good Health
4. Roof over my head from the rain and cold
5. Reliable source of income
6. Food in my belly
7. Clothes on my back
8. A sweet guy to hold me tight and call mine
9. YOU! Yes, you there - looking at the screen. You make someone's day bright just smiling...thank YOU for spreading happiness in this sometimes dim world...keep up the good work!

Happy Thanksgiving to You and Yours!

TG - bringin' back the elastic!

2010-11-24T12:27:00.001-05:00

Thanksgiving is tomorrow! The one day where it should be encouraged to wear pants with elastic waistbands. No buttons should be permitted....it will NOT be pretty when someone's eye is lost due to a flying button after Gobble Palooza! ;D Happy Thanksgiving Eve kids...

Tonight's Homework for YOU:
Brainstorm what you're thankful for
...and post it here in the comments :) !!!

ideasideasideas

2010-11-17T12:35:00.001-05:00

so ive been in a really creative mood lately and browsing for crafty things to keep me occupied. especially with the holidays coming up! i'm all about making gifts and all about THOUGHTFUL things. soo. i think i have a few ideas in the works. i just have to do some cost estimating and bargain shopping. i'll put some of my creations on here because i'm so incredibly excited about it. i'm such a loser - i know. but it's okay! majority of you love the silly thoughtful things i do.

anyways, i hope your day is amazing. and as someone once told me...don't have a good day - MAKE it a good day! ;)

HAPPY HUMP DAY EVERYONE!
2.5 more days til the weekend!!!

very impressive mr. trawick.

2010-11-16T00:03:00.001-05:00

very impressive sir, very impressive.

went and watched a songwriter's session tonight at brewer's alley with jules...awesome event! a girl named Jamie that runs open-mics in Hagerstown was there doing her songs, i love her song "holiday." the second group was pretty good...jenny something. but mr. justin trawick - john-o (julie's boyfriend)'s friend was AMAZING. definitely buying his cd from itunes.

he is awesome live. lots of energy. he's recording a dvd this thursday so julie and i are going to go i think! yeah, i liked his music that much!

check it out. you may like it ;) but then again i LOVE all sorts of music.
http://www.justintrawick.com/
-snow angels
-love song
-life

2010-11-14T19:49:00.001-05:00

wheeeennnn thheee moon hitttsss yyooouurrr eeyyyee liiikkkee a biiiggg pizzzaa piiiieee thats - ammmmmooouurrrrrreeeee (jingalingalingringalingaling)

a sliver

2010-11-14T01:24:00.001-05:00

fragments of glass are scattered across the sky mixed with faerydust.

i wish i could gather it all up in my hands and blow it to you across the miles that separate us.

i am breathless looking up, i wish i could share these stars with you.

because maybe then you'd feel a sliver

of what i do when i look at you while you're

lying next to me in dreaming...

wondering how i got to be so lucky.

Thank you Veterans + Current Soldiers ♥

2010-11-11T12:05:00.001-05:00

But fame is theirs - and future days.
On pillar'd brass shall tell their praise;
shall tell when cold neglect is dead,
"These for their country fought and bled."
[Philip Freneau]

i can still hear the taps being played
while in the earth your body they laid
♥ miss you pap

2010-11-07T21:01:00.001-05:00

...and still being able to find beauty in them at their worst (i hate being sick). Baby, youre amazing. I less than three you.

2010-11-07T20:59:00.001-05:00

True love is giving up the untouched layer of jiffy peanut butter for someone...and getting them medicine and letting them sleep all day...

chalk it up

2010-11-03T22:24:00.004-04:00

to another learned

"lets go to sleep with clearer heads and hearts too big to fit our beds" [ingrid michaelson]

hit the bottom

2010-10-31T23:38:00.000-04:00

and in the free fall i will realize
im better off when i hit the bottom

[paramore]

2010-10-31T15:26:00.001-04:00

I love when the sun pours through the grey clouds like arms stretching out to embrace the earth...rays of light promising warmth from the divine...

lost at sea

2010-10-31T02:56:00.002-04:00

within pools of blue i find myself lost, eager to swim out yet afraid of drowning. in their depths there are miles to travel, shadows and rays of light fight for my attention and i cannot pull myself away.

lurking in, waves crash over me pulling me under, exciting me with the rush of danger. i tread in unknown waters here, trying to keep my head afloat, but there is a part of me that wishes to let go...let my heart feel it's fullness and sink to the bottom of the ocean blue. the sound of my beating heart drowns out the noise of my surroundings, and i am lost in the beautiful storm.

the wind picks up and shakes the floor boards of my soul, losing pieces of my haphazard shelter...a whirlwind of warmth pulls at my body, and as I cling to whats left of the tattered walls...a soft voice whispers on a steady gust to just let go and free fall into the watery abyss. my fingers begin to lose grip, i look up to the stars and wonder if this is it...the inevitable fall after what seems like years of struggle.

tired of control and tired of fear, i embrace relief of falling head first into unknown waters. in my descent a mix of fear and excitement clash inside my chest, i'm picking up speed...feeling like i'm flying and for these short moments nothing else matters anymore and for now i am in awe of what has transpired.

i see the ocean blue for all that it is and is yet to become, finding myself enchanted by its many depths and wonders. i find myself wondering what the ocean sees in me...can it see both the fear and the fascination in my eyes? can it see to my very core? the feelings i've hid from, the wants and desires that i have been denying myself? as the water crests, will it open its arms and accept me? i pray that it strips me bare of any doubts and fears i may have, for my heart is weary. the war between the heart and reason has become a taxing battle that has escalated over the years, and at last it appears that the heart will prove to be victorious.

and as i plunge into the water, i am immersed by a warm feeling that transcends to the very roots of my soul. the sea has embraced me, enveloping me in its arms. it is here in the deep shades of blue, where i can feel my heart mending slowly. and as hues of blue wash over me, im not sure if i have ever felt so at ease. ive found a road leading to a place i can call home.

for through your eyes, I can see into your heart.

look after them...

2010-10-26T22:15:00.002-04:00

[10ish - hold on]

2010-10-25T22:50:00.001-04:00

2 pretty much down - 3 to go!!!

snail mail smiles

2010-10-21T23:38:00.002-04:00

meet me by the sea again, past the point the shoreline bends. where the sand is soft and warm and hangs upon your golden arm. and time won’t move at all...you and me, the secret scene. but back there in the orange light, there’ll be no fear of the night. and time won’t move at all [♥]

? where is your beach ?

[where ever you are]

2010-10-21T07:18:00.001-04:00

The sky looks as if it could taste of cotton candy. I wish i could just stay here and take it all in...